Fear of the Known

This is my second run through with the Adventure Guides and I am a little bit afraid.

Afraid that this time, with all my promises of focusing on my child, I will repeat my errors and neglect my sweetie. No. I will not think that. I do not believe that.

The Adventure Guides is an incredible program. It is essentially an organized play group with camping, crafts, hikes, museum and movie trips, etc. It's more fun that your average parent group because there are regular structured creative events and all that adult commiserating happens over a campfire.

No! This time it will be all about my daughter!

The first run through was with my son, my first born delight. It was accidental. Initially I sought out information for my husband, but as his work committments increased, he foresaw he'd be unable to commit. I couldn't bear to disappoint my son so I joined with him. The AG program is designed around a parent-child membership. I was looking forward to finger painting with him. He was five at the time.

I was unaware of the gravity of my decision when another new member, Valerie, informed me of the upcoming campouts, and wasn't that exciting?

HOLD! Camping? Me?

I do not believe camping is a natural thing. I was born in modernity, with a refrigerator, clean socks and drip coffee. This filled me with more dread than a third child. My ancestry is Native Hawaiian, if I wanted to dig taro roots and make my poi, I have that opportunity... but I BUY my poi. For a reason.

I couldn't imagine sloshing around with God's creatures either. I mean, they live out THERE. I live INSIDE. That is how things work.

After a miserable foray into Big Five Sporting Goods, I purchased some "camping stuff". I even bought beef jerky. I mean, it's camping food, isn't it? My husband assured me his army tent would work out fine.

When I had arrived at my first camp out with my son, I arrived in the dark. That army tent proved to be a canvas octopus, and an angry one at that. I suffered mightily for my camping sins. Later, my son enjoyed sleeping in our SUV. I explained it was like a "spaceship" and wasn't it nice to have a window?

Three years later, I've graduated to a pop up tent (that infamous army tent is still in our garage... why, I don't know), a campside drip coffee maker (fabulous!) and a headlamp for my baseball cap. I still constantly replace flashlights. I think there might be some alien creature in our garage that feeds on them.

Throughout those three years, I tried various jobs within the organization, determined to support the program, and found myself swept away by additional responsiblities. You see, I was also carting around my three year old daughter. The combination equated to very little actual time spent with Little Puffin. Upon reflection, it is actually pretty disappointing. You could think, well, she could have organized her time better, etc etc etc. But maybe. Maybe not. It really comes down to priorities.

This year, Little Puffin will graduate into the "older kids" program, Trailblazers, and enjoy time with his dad. I am aiming to redeem myself with my daughter this time around.
Wish me luck.