Well, Spongebob didn't exactly disappear but my whining campaign about my Rainbow Spongebob name had finally succeeded, and, perhaps, Shooting Star Rose had forgotten really all about it. So a part of me was relieved.
We arrived at Far West Resorts in Santa Paula, CA, feeling a bit tired and oddly prepared: this was our fifth year together as a family in Adventure Guides and although my husband and I still have different camping styles ("Why are you packing the stove first? Do we really need that extra…") we made peace long enough to successfully pack our car in under three hours for a two night campout. All I really cared about is that we brought our camping coffeemaker. THAT should have been packed last, but whatever.
We searched throughout the campsite of a few dozen Adventure Guides wandering about, and we finally found a stretch of dirt, shaded by trees, near a Trailblazer. That was ideal. My husband, Red Thunder, was the new Trailblazer president and so it was particularly important we camp near a TB. Actually, as it turned out, we were camping near the ONLY TB at Induction Camp this year. The Trailblazer program had kinda thinned out this past year. There were a number of "Age outs", or people who just graduate themselves out of the program. The Trailblazers are the "grown up" Adventure Guide-ers, parents whose children have outgrown the crafts and a-b-c-look-at-me-songs (well somewhat) and have grown into soccer balls, football cleats and baseball gloves, Saturday games, lengthy book reports, science experiments, and early algebra. Yet these TBs thankfully want to still spend quality time with their son or daughter. Therefore, the "kinder, gentler" version of Adventure Guides: the Trailblazers fit that need. With less meetings and commitments, the Trailblazer program still parades though campouts and movie days, and if we keep with Red Thunder's vision, more hikes and nature walks.
As the captain of a new mother-daughter tribe, I thought it was important to set up a separate camp site. I was the only member present of my tribe, and the only one staying overnight, but that was not the point. I am a woman, independent super camper, and hear me roar. I marched right up to a spot under a tree and claimed it. I pronounced it "outside my husband's jurisidiction" and marked it immediately with girly stuff: my angel flag, shoes set up in rows, and pumpkins as décor. I regretted leaving my wind chimes at home. I laid out a ground cloth, set up my tiny pop tent, and put my hands on my hips with deep satisfaction.
Red Thunder was just as determined to mark his territory. Corralling his son into working on the pop up tent he received from his dad, they wrangled with a set of poles and ropes until one of them said, "Hey this is broken". (I don't know if the tent actually arrived broken.) Our resident TB'er was also an engineer, and came sailing over with duct tape. In true testosterone fashion, the three of them heaved onto the poles and subdued them with enough tape to secure a small elephant, and tah dah, "Man Land" was born. Brown, leaning a bit, and silvered with tape, their tent was a proud sail of manhood and accomplishment. I saluted them.
Later, Blue and Pink Butterfly arrived to Camp, and Shooting Star Rose and I were very excited. After some immediate chatter and settling in, the Butterflies, Rebecca and I took a quick hike about the area. Blue Butterfly discovered some wild asparagus. Pink Butterfly, Shooting Star Rose, my son and his TB partner, and one other child had a shrieking good time playing various versions of hide and seek in the neighboring brush and wild weeds. It seemed fine and dandy until Shooting Star Rose came gleefully flying out with a sharpened stick. Okay. Game over.
"But Mom…." She started to whine.
"But nothing. I want the stick."
"No."
"Either the stick or we go home" (A useless threat but Shooting Star Rose hadn't figured that out … yet).
"…. Uh… okay"
I was the proud owner of a primitive spear.
Later, when we were making some crafts, Shooting Star Rose reached for a pile of my string.
"What do you need that for, honey?" I knew better than to think she wanted to help with my craft.
"I need it."
"What for?"
"I just need it, okay?" She was getting frustrated.
"I don't mind giving you some, but I need some for my craft here. I can't give it all to you. You can have SOME."
"Okay, fine, give me some."
"Please."
"PLEASE."
I continued to lecture her on how my stuff is not HER stuff, and she can't just grab everything… and she plopped a kiss on my cheek.
"Okay, thanks MOM!" She smiled happily and took off with a load of string. My mind wandered back in time to her… spear. Where did I put that spear? An image came to mind. Oh. Oh, no.
"Gee," my friend and adult camping partner, Blue Butterfly, smiled at me, interrupting my train of thought. "I could see myself having that same conversation with MY daughter." She smiled at me, conspirators in parenting.
I smiled, deeply and sincerely back.
Despite all the travails of camping and work involved in the Adventure Guides, it was these moments, moments of parents of like minds and similar experiences, where we share our griefs and joys, that
makes this program so special to me. It gives me a sense of relief to know that I am not alone in my frustration, and that there are others out there, who are trying their best to be the best parent they can be. Children are really wonderful, gifts from God and being around other parents in this type of setting reminds me of that.
"Rebecca!" my son howled across the campsite. "MOM!"
Oh. Oh, no.
