Name Power

    It may be the spiritual, mystical Earth mother inside me, but names have always been an interest of mine. Not purely for social reasons but all for what I perceive to be the meaning, the power, and the destiny of the name holder. Many cultures regard a name as something of such significance that parents spend hours, perhaps longer, reviewing names, consulting prayer leaders or shamans (perhaps named differently in their culture). I have spent a lot of time agonizing over the natural names for my children, much longer poring through their potential Hawaiian names, prior to their earthly arrival. So naturally I looked forward to my new Adventure Guide name with my daughter.

    My husband, Red Thunder, said it was silly to change names from child to child. I had graduated AG with my son, Little Puffin, and had carried the weight of Big Puffin as my AG name. My son had named me. Tell me. If you were named Big Puffin, and you had a chance for a re-christening, what would YOU do?

    Actually, I, in the Adventure Guide spirit, believe it's important to allow the child to participate as much as possible in the tribe, including naming themselves and naming their parent. I thought it was an interesting twist: the child naming the parent. I looked on it as a transfer of power. The child gained the power over the parent. But the parent allowed this happen, so I looked at it as a balance. I am quite pleased with this philosophy.

    Previously, my capricious son had named me twice, growing bored with his name, thus compelled to rename me in conjuction. My first name was Sinking Rock. It became Sinking Stone for the benefit of alliteration. I think it had to with his perception of my enthusiasm about camping. His name at the time was Blue Spotted Wave. I thought it was a cold, leprous, wet name but shrugged, it was his name, and he was proud of it. To name yourself is to confer an independence to yourself, I believe. He then changed his name to Dark Cyclone. I think he was feeling, as he grew from five to six, the need to be more "grown up". He didn't feel like changing my name. I don't think he really remembered what he named me, always calling me MOM.

    Suddenly he remembered he had a deep affection for Dances with Penguins, a former Federation Captain. He became Little Puffin. By default, his being Little, I therefore became Big. I am grateful he wasn't Smart or Handsome Puffin (which he could very well have been). It was something I understood but endured. It appeared as he grew from eight to nine, he became sentimental, returning to a memory of his younger childhood, asking for more hugs along the way. He was again Little and no longer something dark or powerful.

"SO…"

"Yes?"

"Rebecca. What name did you pick for yourself? You know for your new tribe?"

"Shooting Star. No, Shooting Rose."

"Shooting Rose?" I thought of a pretty flower with a serious attitude problem. How perfect.

"No. I said Shooting Star."

Sigh.

"Yes, of course. That's very pretty."

"No it's not!"

"Yes, you're right. What did you want to name me?" I asked to change the subject but also because I was curious.

"Hmmm."

"Well?" I prompted.

"Hmmm. Uh, Spot."

I blinked. I look at her to see if she was laughing at me. No, she wasn't.

"Well, thank you. Um, could you… " my voice trailed off. Well, am I keeping with my aforementioned principals of allowing the child to have the power, the child be in charge? No, I wasn't. But dang it, I am not being called SPOT.

"How about adding a color?" I suggested.

"Okay. White."

"White Spot?"    I could hear my husband laughing in my mind. I don't want to go into it. "No, not white. No, not white." Okay, having giving up my principals, I threw in the entire handtowel. Or handbasket. Whatever the phrase is.

"Yellow?" She looked at me helpfully. Noooooooo. Not yellow!

"Red?" I have to give her credit, she was really trying.

"Okay, Spot. I'll take Spot. But how about Rainbow?"

"Rainbow Spot?" She asked. I couldn't lose with every single color.

She frowned.

"I don't know."

"Okay, then Spot for now. Okay? For now."

She grinned.

I don't think my daughter needs a transfer of power.

If anything, I think I can borrow some from her.

If she'll let me.